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My 7 Habits of Highly Effective Conservative Unity Part 2 by Andy Peth

9/24/2014

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For those who missed Part 1, click here.

(Note: This article is written with great respect to Stephen Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”)

“But what would I say?  Last time I reached out, they took advantage of me, and I get mad every time I think of it!  Besides, they don’t trust me any more than I trust them.  What could I possibly say?”

Hopelessness.  Confusion.  Defiance.  These I hear from every corner of Conservatism, as most respond with skepticism to my pleas for unity.   Are they angry?  Oh yes, but there’s much more.  They’re afraid.  Almost doomed.  Exhausted from years of trading blame, they wonder aloud, “Can America really end this way?  Is the Right beyond repair?  What can we say?”

To the Tea Party, “Establishment,” Christian Right, and Moderates, I hereby offer a service that is well above my pay grade and beyond my talents—but too necessary to leave undone.  I will attempt to write your lines for you.  No, not all of them—just enough to get the ball rolling.  In Part 1, I outlined how we stop being victims with the first three of Covey’s “7 Habits.”   Here in Part 2, I’ll briefly adapt Covey’s next trio.  And in Part 3, I’ll write out each message itself, closing with the all-important 7th Habit.

Here are Habits 4, 5, and 6:

Habit 4:  Think Win-Win 

Whether negotiating in business, personal relationships, or a political party, we should seek solutions that represent a win for each side.  Sound unrealistic?  On the contrary, it’s the only realistic solution.

Look at business.  Suppose you seek win-lose with your customers, constantly taking more money than the value you return.  Is that sustainable?  Of course not; you’ll lose customers.  Then suppose you seek lose-win, playing the martyr as you give away the store.  Does that work?  Again, it’s unsustainable, since competitors will make higher profits, build more capital, and wait you out (yet, some people demand American oil companies charge less than global market value…).  The only realistic strategy is win-win, where you insist upon satisfied results for both parties. 

This is true in relationships, community groups, or political parties.   Consider marriage:  For me, if my wife doesn’t win in a “negotiation” (to use business terms), then I feel it’s a loss, since she’s more important than the situation itself.  Likewise, Conservatives should think, “Even if I win control of the party and you lose, I’ll consider it a loss because I failed to provide you a win.”  This runs against current thinking, but what other method is sustainable?  Division?  How’s that working?

“Think Win-Win” is not a gimmick, but a realistic commitment.  Just as “Be Proactive” unleashes individuals, “Think Win-Win” unleashes relationships.

Habit 5:  Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood

This is the Habit of listening, not just hearing words.  Oftentimes, two sides will only listen to one another while planning their responses, resulting in fruitless debates.  But Habit 5 restructures the process, asking us to first listen responsively, even trying to restate their position better.  Try it sometime.  Sure, you want to be understood, but try setting that aside and making others’ points with them—listening without planning your reply.  Then get ready.  Experiencing what Dr. Covey calls, “Emotional Air,” some will almost appear to breathe easy for the first time.  The weirdest part?  It even helps with adversaries.

I manage at a business with great patrons.  Sometimes, though, a few can be emotional and combative, even emboldened by alcohol.   I don’t mind.  Dozens of employees have commented on how I lower tensions; stopping fights and calming complaints.  My secret?  Habit 5.  Emotional Air.  Just help people feel understood, and they’ll relax.  Many even thank me for the respect I’ve shown while I’m asking them to leave.  It’s crazy.

Within the Right, we should replace internal debates with discussions; because we debate to win, but we discuss to learn.  Seek first to understand, my friends.  And oddly enough, the more we learn from people, the more influence we gain with them—and that is the greatest win-win of all.

Habit 6:  Synergize

Most folks see teamwork like this:  1 person’s efforts + 1 person’s efforts = two people’s production.  Thus, 1+1=2.  Some view it more negatively as grudging compromise, wherein 1+1=1½.  But with Synergy, we realize that 1+1 can equal 3, 7, 20, or even 10,000.  Why?  Because having applied Habits 1-5, we can now capitalize on what once limited us--our differences.

When opposed, our differences produce division; but when united, our differences produce diversity—a very good thing.  (Note:  I speak of rightwing chosen diversity, not leftwing forced diversity)  Surrounded by diverse thought, rightwingers grow in knowledge, strategy, skills—all with increased marketing reach.  For instance:  Social moderates reach people who ignore Christian Conservatives like me, and vice versa.  Likewise, national security hawks and doves reach entirely different audiences.  So, 1+1=10,000.

Don’t believe me?  Try an ultra-combative example:  Abortion.  Do pro-life Conservatives like me benefit from pro-choice Conservatives?  Yes, in every way! 

  1. First, the opposing views of pro-choice Conservatives sharpen my reasoning in safe settings, which is far better than getting mauled in public debate.

  2. Pro-choice Conservatives draw more people to a party where voices like mine are freely heard—thus expanding my audience.

  3. They support school choice, freeing parents to have kids taught in surroundings more aligned with their values. 

  4. They almost always reject extremes like late-term abortion or forcing pro-lifers to pay taxes toward personal choices they oppose.  This softens the public toward further pro-life reasoning.

One could argue that without pro-choice Conservatives, pro-life Conservatives can be cut off, preaching to shrinking choirs.  And abortion is one of the most difficult examples; hundreds of easier ones exist.

This is how we Synergize.  Transformed from divided to diverse by Habits 1-5, we learn faster, reach further, and produce more than we ever thought possible.

Closing Words

I’m often asked how I can work with “those Tea Partiers” or “those Establishment types” or—most often for a Christian like me—“those Social Liberals.”

My answer?  I LOVE working with them, provided they unite around Individual Liberty.  The reason is simple:  I want the freedom to live my life, not force it on others, as this reflects my Christian faith.  Nowhere in Scripture are we called to make others live like us, for there is no Christian Jihad.  We Christians are called to offer and model our views, not impose them.  I’m proud of that!  So to, the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People are designed for those wanting to unleash themselves and others, not for people wanting to control those around them.  We want everyone’s potential fulfilled.

If you share this desire, and are sensing some shred of hope in uniting the Right, stay tuned for Part 3.


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My 7 Habits of Highly Effective Conservative Unity Part 1 by Andy Peth

9/20/2014

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(Note: This article is written with great respect to Stephen Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”)





Here comes another November, and once again, the Right is dividing itself out of existence: 

• Establishment leaders consider “Tell everyone to shut up and get behind us!” a viable option.
• Tea Party leaders consider “Punish the Establishment by dividing our ranks and staying home!” a
   viable option. 
• Social Moderates consider “Publicly disown the Christian Right!” a viable option. 
• Conservative Christians consider “Abandon any candidate who doesn’t agree with us 100%!” a
   viable option.

Are these really options?  Sure they are.  Driving over a cliff is an option.  Watching “The View” is an option.  Driving over a cliff while watching “The View”—though redundant—is an option.  Endless options exist, but many of them aren’t, you know, sane.

The reality is, we must unite or perish.  It’s no one’s fault; there are too many Democrats.  Like the young couple struggling with their checkbook, Conservatives lack the numbers to indulge every impulse.  Without victory in November, our principles have no vehicle to enact them.

Am I asking us to just hold our noses and vote as one?  No, that’s too limited.  I’m asking us to change the thinking that produced our decline.  Built on a shaky foundation of shared anger at the Left, our split coalition was inevitable—and can be remade on surer footing.   Impossible?  Not at all.  Forgive my Empowerment Seminar rhetoric, but it’s time we realized that the sins of others do not dictate our response—WE dictate our response!  We can choose a better way; and we can do it together.

For the good of America, the Right must unite.  And since the best unity program I’ve seen is Stephen Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,” my wishful plan will follow Dr. Covey’s steps.

Habit 1:  Be Proactive

This means we do not let the words and actions of others dictate our response.  WE dictate our response—that guy provoking us does not.  WE chart our course.  WE own our actions, since blaming others only achieves the goal of, well, blaming others.

Perhaps you represent the established GOP leadership, and are angry over losing winnable Senate seats in Delaware, Nevada, Colorado, and elsewhere with Tea Party candidates.  Or perhaps you are a Tea Partier, and are angry over an ultra-corrupt primary in Mississippi, lost presidential elections with moderate candidates offering uninspiring messages, or nasty words from Mitch McConnell.

Then here’s an opportunity:  You can lash out, letting the actions of others control your response, or you can free yourself; choosing to learn from—not dwell in—the past.  You can be better than the forces attempting to program you.  You can create.  You can choose better options.  You can
Be Proactive.

Habit 2:  Begin with the End in Mind

Aiming for nothing, we’re bound to hit it.  So now that we’re free to create, let’s start by creating realistic goals, never allowing the foolishness of others (or ourselves) to wreck our focus.  After all, what do we really want politically?  What’s our endgame?  Let’s aim before firing.

For me, the goal is simple:  I want Americans to fall in love with America again.  I want us all to embrace individual liberty, not collective control; and sadly, this requires defeating a political party wholly devoted to collective control—the Democrats.  I don’t want others forced to hold my personal views, but I do want the freedom to hold my views openly—and I want the same for those disagreeing with me.  I want government to protect our liberty, not intrude upon it.  To sum up all my political beliefs,
I want to control my own life, not yours.

That’s my goal, and from what Conservatives of every stripe have told me, it is shared.  Alas, the goal can only be achieved through voting majorities, and that requires unity.  No other way exists.  So, before I act (or “pro-act”), I must arrange my steps away from division that loses, toward the unity that wins. 

Habit 3:  Put First Things First

Dr. Covey used a great illustration here by setting containers of rocks on a table—one with big rocks, another with much smaller rocks, and so forth.  He then challenged people to get all the rocks into a final container.  The point was simple:  When we add the little ones first, the rocks won’t all fit.  We must first add the big rocks, letting the smaller rocks and sand sift in as we add them later.  Eventually, we fit everything in—achieving far more than we thought possible.

This is true when organizing our lives.  Obsessing over smaller things, we realize decades later that the big things remain unaddressed—our lives are too full for them.  Thus, we age and die without ever reaching our Habit 2 goals.

Restoring America can’t happen without defeating or converting those who oppose America’s restoration.  So, here are some big rocks:  We must unite our side and draw others to it—both now and going forward—and these things require a new message and arrangement.  I don’t say this lightly, as if everyone’s concerns are minor—we’ll address those with later habits.  But obsessing over intramural battles for control of the Right only guarantees success for the Left; and this leaves our goal of restoring America to age and die, because big rocks are still “on the table.”

For example, a Christian like me may see fighting abortion as the only goal (and I think it’s huge), whereas a social moderate might deem skyrocketing national debt to be our great enemy (he too would have a point).  Another Conservative might see gun rights as the big issue, while yet another might stress securing our borders, while others still might emphasize energy independence or school choice.  But none of these can be addressed with a fractured Conservative Movement that fails to draw converts!  Our divided numbers make all other goals unattainable, so we address these big rocks first.

Perhaps you’re thinking, “Restoring foundational principles comes first!”  Hey, I agree.  But the very process of uniting us and drawing others will revolve around foundational principles, while never casting aside the need for political success.  Work with me here.

Conclusion

While these first three habits unleash and refocus us as individuals, the next three unleash and refocus us as a group.  But don’t skip any steps.  We can’t set proper goals (see Habit 2) while still embracing victimhood through allowing the sins of others to control us (see Habit 1).  And as goal-less victims, we’ll never arrange our lives toward moving big rocks (see Habit 3), since those will appear immovable.

Victims don’t create; they merely protest, retreat, or plot revenge.  Have you ever explained the greatness of free markets to victims?  Good luck.  Bound in bitterness, they find hope in lowering the bar of success to “all my failures are caused by others.”  This is why limiting others becomes a goal in itself, whereas unleashing oneself becomes a pipe dream (quite literally a pipe dream, here in Colorado). 

Ironically, we Conservatives--all of us—have begun reveling in the same excuse, and so have become as hopeless as the societal victims to whom we preach.  Paralyzed by the actions of others, we gear our efforts toward little rocks (like controlling or abandoning the GOP) with no hope of sustaining big rocks (like restoring America).  Eventually, limiting those we despise becomes a goal in itself, as if “I told you so!” after Election Day is somehow equal to “We won!”  No big rocks are moved, and the despair within us grows.  America spirals down.  Hope is lost.  By the way, this hopelessness is the entire reason I (along with my patient wife) created The Party Of Choice.

My friends, we aren’t victims.  We are Conservatives.  We are bigger than the problem, and the only thing preventing us from conquering it is our choice not to do so.  That can—and must—be fixed.  This first half of my message was for re-orienting us all toward a winning mindset. The second half will apply that winning mindset toward a winning strategy.

I’ll see you then.






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Wolf Hunt by Andy Peth

9/14/2014

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“Watch out for false prophets.  They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves.  By their fruit you will recognize them.  Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles?  Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit.”  —Matthew 7:15-17

Do you trust everyone claiming to be a Conservative?  I hope not.  Expecting wolves to appear as sheep, Jesus saw through their pleasant smiles and likeminded buzzwords, instead posing one simple question:  “What’s your fruit?”  In other words, “What results come from following your message?”  

Wolves infiltrate a group to harm its mission.  That’s their bad fruit.  Against Jesus, this meant undermining the gospel, but the wolves facing us have a different goal—undermining America.  These wolves despise America’s founding principles, and they seek to remake America with governing majorities—caucusing as one to overrun liberty.   

That means electing Democrats.  Period.  

So fellow Conservatives, let’s talk about our fruit—politically.  Faced with an enormous and unified Left, we can only win elections by uniting ourselves and drawing others to our ranks.  There is no other way.   “Unite Us, Draw Others”—those four words represent the fruit of winning Conservatives (and the hope for our nation).  Thus, if someone produces other fruit—if they divide us and repel others—we’ll know they are bad political trees, leading us to ruin.  

Unite Us, Draw Others = Good Fruit = Good Tree
Divide Us, Repel Others = Bad Fruit = Bad Tree  

It doesn’t get simpler than that.  

                                                            Know Your Enemy  

But more is needed when hunting wolves.  In preparing for their attacks, you must first know two truths about the American Left:
  1. They have virtually unlimited resources and finances.
  2. They have absolutely no conscience; nothing limiting what they’re willing to say or do in order to win elections and seize control.

What does this mean?  Simply put, while posing as Conservatives, undercover Democrats can go anywhere (with unlimited resources), while saying and doing anything (without conscience).  Likely paid, these people are well trained and fluent in your talking points.  They use your bumper stickers, frequent your blogs, recite scriptures, and go to your meetings.  Taking time you think Liberals wouldn’t take, they form friendships you think they won’t form, and say things you think they’d never say—all to gain your trust. 

Unbelievable?  Again, consider our opponent, and ask yourself, “If I wanted to undermine the Right and could—and would—do anything, what would I do?  Would I just shout from the outside, or would I subvert from the inside?”  

And once inside, who is the wolf’s top target?  Who does he most seek to damage?  Again, remember that, while we Conservatives bicker over ideology, Liberals unite around one goal—controlling society through winning elections.  So, the wolf only cares about math.  That said, here’s the wolf’s top target:  

Whoever is the most numerically viable opponent to their Democratic candidate.  

For the wolf, no one else matters.  If the wolf moves votes from his most numerically viable opponent to others with less chance to win—or to not voting at all—the wolf succeeds.   

Oh, I know what some readers are thinking:  “So, Andy’s telling us to get in line behind the Republican candidate and shut up, right?  He’s just another Establishment crony!”  

If you think this, you’ve missed it.  I’m stressing mathematical reality because this is all that matters to our opponent.  Truth is, the wolf can pose as anything—whatever helps best in a certain district, state, or national election.  

For instance:

If the GOP candidate is a Tea Party Conservative like Ted Cruz, the wolf might infiltrate moderate ranks, stirring up dissension against “those Tea Partiers who always demand our money and votes while calling us a bunch of evil compromisers.”

Then again, if the GOP candidate is a Mormon like Mitt Romney, the wolf may pose as an Evangelical Christian, telling believers (like me) that “a vote for Romney is a vote for Satan.”  This strategy paid off handsomely in the 2012 race.

Perhaps the GOP candidate is moderate, leading the wolf to infiltrate Tea Party groups, mouthing phrases like, “Why must we always support the ‘Lesser of Two Evils’ when we know it won’t work?  Well, never again, I say!  It’s about time they see what happens when they ignore us!”

Or then again, the wolf might pose as a supporter of the GOP candidate, insulting other GOP factions so they’ll stay home on Election Day.  Some GOP candidates (ie. Mitch McConnell) even help this along with their own divisive comments. 

We don’t locate wolves by thinking about what we want.  We locate wolves by thinking about what they want.  Laughing at our internal battles, the wolf just picks whatever side provides the best leverage for creating division.  In fact, multiple wolves might choose opposite sides to escalate our internal war.  Wolves don’t care how they beat us.  

                                                            Simple Clues

But here’s good news:  Wolves are easy to hunt.  Just look at their fruit! 
  1. If someone’s actions don’t unite us and draw others, then they’re either wolves or misguided brethren influenced by wolves. 

  2. Furthermore, if following their advice would harm the most numerically viable opponent to the Democrat, then they are acting as wolves—whether knowingly or not.  Ignore their rhetoric, since wolves will say anything.  Look only at the math.

During the 2012 election, I hunted some wolves on Conservative blogs, where one classic wolf posed as a Ron Paul supporter.  There were telltale signs.  For instance, while he’d often attack Romney or the Republicans alone (writing endless lists comparing them to Obama), he never attacked Obama alone.  Thus, all his efforts were geared toward dividing Obama’s opposition, not Obama’s supporters—though he would mouth classic criticisms of Obama.  Our division was his only goal, and harming Obama’s most numerically viable opponent was his only fruit.  

Success!  I had located a wolf!  Now, all that remained was to expose him.

The wolf claimed to stand for “principle” (a common tactic for wooing Tea Partiers and Libertarians).  Ignoring this drivel, I asked why he was so determined to divide Obama’s opposition.  Predictably, he said he was equally opposed to both Republicans and Democrats (ironic, given that he’d been spewing far more conservative stances than liberal ones).

Now I had him.

Thrilled at his misstep, I challenged him to provide pre-dated examples of when he’d gone on Liberal blogs and pushed such dissent on the Left—so he could prove he was truly a “principled Libertarian equally opposing Democrats and Republicans.”  Naturally, he failed to do so, and after Obama won re-election, the wolf proudly proclaimed his Democratic support.  By then, many on the blog were already on to him.

Hunted and exposed, he did no damage.  Unfortunately, many wolves did succeed, as millions on the divided Right stayed home, allowing another Democrat romp.

                                                            Stopping The Wolves

It doesn’t take a master strategist to hunt wolves.  Just ask, “Is this person uniting us and drawing others?  Or is this person producing the fruit of a wolf—driving support away from the Democrat’s most numerically viable opponent?  Ultimately, which side—Liberals or Conservatives—applauds this person’s actions?  What’s the math?”

Remember, not all who divide us are paid subversives working for George Soros.  Some just aren’t considering their fruit.  But that’s okay.  When hunting wolves, we don’t have to “get” them all, and it’s not even crucial to discern between the wolves and misguided brethren.  Just unite us, draw others, and don’t let wolves divide you…  

…for that, my friends, is the greatest way to drive them out.  

Let’s close with one more comment from Jesus regarding wolves.  

"I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.”  —Matthew 10:16  

When faced with highly financed wolves who are devoid of conscience, it isn’t enough to be innocent in our principles.  We must also be shrewd in our strategy, forging the alliances necessary to deny wolves their prize. 

Therefore, be innocent as doves, shrewd as snakes, and victorious on Election Night.

In other words, don’t ever, ever, ever, ever, ever help the wolves win.  

Happy hunting.

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Morality Sells vs. Morality Scares by Andy Peth

9/8/2014

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Last week, some stars had nude pics of themselves get hacked and posted.  

Tragic? Hardly.  A good lesson?  You bet.  High profile examples provide much needed warnings for young people about discretion and privacy. They provide healthy fear; even wisdom.  What they don’t provide, however, is an opportunity for us to preach morality.  

After all, why should people be moral?  Have you ever asked this?  Why do we ever restrict sensual urges?  Is it only to avoid judgment at the hands of Bible-thumping Christians (like me) still holding to “antiquated” ideals?  
Doubtful.  

Perhaps you’ve noticed that young people today tend to wear clothing.  It’s true!  But why are they so Puritanical?  Why so modest?  Here’s why:  They actually enjoy physical privacy, along with casual interaction devoid of prolonged looks at their…stuff.  These kids aren’t avoiding the Lord’s loyal fan base.  They’re avoiding each other.  Without admitting it,  today’s teens find varying levels of morality to be perfectly natural—and as it happens, quite fashionable.  

That in mind, I still  wonder why they ever set morality aside.  I suppose, to the degree they go public, stripping off layers draws them favorable attention.  They’re seeking value.  And thanks to the miracles of modern technology and piracy, their publicity can jump to viral status with one tap on a bored hacker’s keypad.

That’s a lot of value…of the creepy kind.  Think of several guys my age (I’m 51) leering at a college girl.  Creeeeeeeeeepy.  Fortunately for the young lass, men my age tend to nod off every few minutes, waking up later in confusion, wondering why all these people are trying to revive us.  As a side note, I find this makes driving in traffic a thrilling adventure.

Ah, but since many youngsters do expose themselves online for creepy old men, perhaps a Christian zealot like me should offer some sort of moral guidance.  Here goes:

Young Americans, it’s natural to enjoy looking good (so I’m told).  It’s also natural to enjoy sex. 

What is not natural is earning your value.  Those who value you more because you remove more clothing or round the bases toward that intimate home run will…well…devalue you if you either stop or reverse course altogether.  No matter how much you enjoy the attention or passion, there’s that little voice in your head saying, “If I stop now, what will he/she think?”  Thus, with every base—or piece of clothing—you are preventing their disappointment.  You’re earning your value, and at your deepest level, you know you shouldn’t have to.  Thus, you feel cheap.

That’s why we Christians (among others) advise waiting until—prepare to groan--marriage.  Once the ring is on, that person has already committed fully to your value, leaving you nothing left to earn.  In one of life’s great ironies, “that old ball and chain” provides complete intimacy…with no strings attached.  Go figure.  When Christians recommend waiting, they're not judging young people.  They're simply sharing their view that young people are precious.  

Let me close this sermon, after which you will uncontrollably dump buckets of money in my collection plate:  Your value can’t be earned.  It can only be accepted, and that only with a lasting commitment.  Yes, you’re really worth that much, and the person robbing your treasure isn’t the older guy catching your snapshots gone viral, or even the panting boyfriend…it’s you.  You already know you like modesty, so don’t trade it in to someone who prefers you have less of it.

As for Hollywood’s latest privacy violation, there’s no moral lesson there—unless morality for you is, “Don’t get coked up and post nudies that can be hacked by bitter nerds who’ve never had non-virtual girlfriends.”  

Morality isn’t something you do to avoid being caught, but rather, to celebrate being special.  Maybe more teens should consider trying it.

And maybe, just maybe, we should consider not scaring them into it.

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